How to make a change
Change is something, I believe, we all want to do. There is always something in our lives that we think, “heck my life would be better if I could just change that one habit.” That habit could be to stop overeating, to stop smoking, to get more exercise, maybe it’s to be a better person, a better mother or better dad. It does not really matter what the change is, what matters is that you want to make a change.
The problem with change
There is a problem when one decides they want to make a change. The problem is quite simple! Change is scary, change implies that something that we are used to, accustomed to and feel comfortable with, is about to, well change! This is difficult. You have always done X when Y happens. It has become a natural response, but now you want to trigger response Z instead. You wonder how that is going to work, what it will mean, and what knock on effects it will have.
You see we are creatures of habit, for example, my daily routine is:
- Snooze the iPhone one or two times
- Get up
- Wash my teeth
- While doing this I put on the first coffee of the day
- I drink the coffee
- I write in my diary
- I then brew the cup of coffee to take to work
- While that is brewing I take a shower
This is my routine and it is comfortable (and there’s nothing wrong with it!) But let’s say someone says ok now you have to change the routine and get a 20 minute jog in before your shower. Ufffff! That means that all the other parts of the routine will change, I will need to get up earlier, not have that first cup of coffee. In the end although it seems like a good, and something that I should do, the idea of change can be uncomfortable.
Are all changes equal?
Of course not. Some changes we do because we think we should, other changes we do because we have to. For example, I probably should do some weight training so that I can build up muscle but it’s not really a life or death situation. I have to give up smoking because …..
Now did you see the keyword above. Because. Your because is your reason to make the change, and if that because is not strong enough, you will fall back into old ways.
For example, if I think about a change such as – I should do some weight training because I will look better, it is a good thing to do, and it will make me stronger. This change is interesting but the reason is not strong enough for you to continue the change long term.
However, if I say I need to give up smoking, drinking and eating unhealthy because of a heart condition because if I don’t I increase the possibility of a heart attack. Now this reason (my because) has suddenly become a life or death situation thus it is more likely that I will make this change and keep to it.
You need to want to change
This is fundamental, also based on your because, but still extremely important. Many people have a strong because. I will give up smoking because my daughter wants me to, or I will stop eating unhealthy as I need to lose weight and my wife has said I should. These particular changes will probably not happen as the person themselves do not want to change, they are doing it for someone else.
You must make sure that your because is strong enough, and ensure that you want to change that habit in your life.
Don’t expect miracles
Look if you have read my blog before you know that I tell it as I see it, I am not into the whole pretend that this is easy nonsense. Change is difficult, change is not easy, change does not happen overnight. You’re used to something, you have done if for months or years even, you have this habit for a reason. Maybe it’s to combat stress, to make you feel happier or some other reason. It is a well known fact that behind every bad habit is actually some sort of good intention that we justify the habit with.
The change is going to be difficult, you are going to have times where you want to give up, and heck it is much easier to say, “well I tried but I am just to weak to change.” That’s not a good mindset as then when you try to make your next change you remember that you are weak, you can’t make changes etc.
You need to focus, to keep the end goal in mind (living longer) and think about that when you have your moments of weakness.
Change is not going to happen overnight, but bit by bit you will progress – this I can promise you.
Conclusion
What I would like you to do is to think of something you want to change, and plan out how you are going to do it, and then take the first step in making that change. Feel free to chat to me on Facebook or to join my Facebook group.
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